I'm wondering if anyone ever reads this sentence.

Friday, June 19, 2009

OK, Enough of This Crap - I'm Posting

Man, I don't know what the heck's going on with my blogger jones this season. Either the Mets finally killed it, or it died of natural causes. I think it's a little of both.

For those not in the know, I previously spent three full seasons offering insight, perspective, humor, and non-Sabermetric-related analysis of this here baseball team. So why have I chosen this season - in which so much has happened - to stand largely mute? Could it be the back-to-back horrific finishes the past two years? The crippling injuries this season? The shoddy defense or untimely hitting? The fact that our lineup is now packed with more scrubs than a Clorox convention? Oliver Perez?

Once again, I'm going with all of the above.

But fear not: I'm here to tell you that Toasty Joe is going to fight his demons. After all, what would a third consecutive year of bad baseball be if we didn't have gallows humor? And that's what I aim to provide.

Now, having said all of that, I must tell you - from about 11:00 p.m. last Friday night to maybe 4:00 p.m. the next day, I was thoroughly and utterly convinced of something: The Mets, with help from Luis Castillo, had done something that I didn't think it was possible to do:

They broke baseball.

I don't mean they blew a game, broke their fans' hearts, and so forth. I mean they broke baseball. Permanently. As in, there is no longer any need or any point to me watching any baseball games. Not just this season, but ever. That's how soul-crushing, stomach-destroying, and mind-annihilating Friday night's turn of events was. Had I been updating this blog regularly, that would've been my headline on Saturday morning: "The Mets broke baseball."

But of course, they didn't really break baseball. (Although yours truly nearly broke his head slamming it against a wall). In fact, they somehow made it MORE tolerable. For example, after a splendid victory on Saturday, they went out and took a complete dump on the field in a 15-0 drubbing on Sunday. Did I give a shit? Not really. And then last night - they blow a 1-run lead in the 9th and lose the game. Did I gnash my teeth and stomp and curse? No chance.

For you see, I learned something last week: No matter how bad a loss is, it's not June 12, 2009.

In fact, how's that for next season's slogan?

"The 2010 New York Mets: No Matter How Bad A Loss Is, It's Not June 12, 2009. Get your season tickets today!"

3 Comments:

Blogger Coop said...

Toasty - whatever you do, don't retire! I've been going through the same thing, my blog postings have been uninspired also to say the least. I call it "Post-Traumatic Mets Disorder."

1:33 PM

 
Blogger Doug said...

Oh thank God. Thought we lost you there. I needed you on Sat the 13, pal. Don't drop the ball again. (ha!)

Seriously though, clutch pop-up there, A-roid.

2:18 PM

 
Blogger James Allen said...

"Where we you when Castillo dropped the ball?"

Hmmm. Sounds like a possible book featuring a collection of essays. Oddly enough for me, I could not watch it on TV, so I heard Howie Rose make the call, which, to Howie's credit, was just as terrible as watching it.

In regards to Sunday's game, where you say the Mets "took a complete dump on the field"; I disagree, a dump of that magnitude would actually have required an effort.

But here's the thing: The Phillies keep losing! You want bad beats? Just ask any Phillie fan (if you actually voluntarily interact with such a creature.) Their pen this year is like the Mets pen last year, yesterday being a shining example, with Ryan Madison giving up an Aaron Heilman Special to Brian Roberts.

So, after playing blah ball all week, the Mets have actually gained two games on the Phillies. This might turn into one of the most uninspiring division battles in some time.

7:51 AM

 

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